The Muppets 1.03: “Bear Left Then Bear Write”
Piggy and Christina “Up Late”!
As with most of the other guest stars before her, Applegate is a perfect Muppet guest, elegantly playing off Piggy, acting so innocent that whether she’s being a Hollywood phony, relishing Piggy’s humiliation, or if she actually doesn’t get why Piggy’s so upset, after all she was just having some fun with her, is up for debate. To a degree, at least. Meanwhile, Piggy naturally isn’t as skilled at subtlety. “I’m telling you this because we’re friends,” she sweetly begins, “we’re no longer friends“. But Christina just lightly laughs it off, telling her it could’ve been much worse. She could have brought footage from a mortifying sake commercial Piggy shot for the Japanese market in the past. When Piggy vows vengeance, Christina says, “You’re so cute!” and walks off, smiling, but again, in such a genuine, charming way, it’s difficult to not fall for her.
For the rest of the episode, Piggy plots her blonde nemesis’ downfall. Unfortunately, her first tactic of having Scooter track down embarrassing footage of Christina online fails miserably. “There was nothing? Not even her being snippy to a restaurant hostess?” Piggy asks. Scooter responds, “No, I googled that and 10 clips of you came up!” What I love about Piggy is that she simply expects everyone to be as much of a diva as she is.
In the end, she decides to “trick” Christina into falling victim to her own humiliating video but in such an obvious way, her target immediately sees right through it. Scooter knocks on her door, wielding a cake, and Christina instantly asks him if Piggy’s trying to set her up, gamely agreeing to stick her own head directly in the cake so that he doesn’t lose his job (see, that’s kind of her!). And although it clearly isn’t an accident and she willingly did it herself, Piggy practically cackles as she gets her footage from the backseat of her car, which is so very Piggy…and is then arrested an instant later for filming/stalking Ms Applegate, while Christina invites Scooter in for coffee, ignoring Piggy’s yells, all making for a perfect Piggy-is-the-architect-of-her-own-downfall scenario. As with the reason behind Kermit breaking up with her, Piggy and her ego can be her own worst enemy, and the show is handling that tragic flaw beautifully.
And putting aside my qualms regarding the object of Gonzo’s romantic attentions, his plot on the whole is very fun, too, revolving around his having created a fake online identity for dating purposes, using Liam Hemsworth’s photo as his profile pic. However, he didn’t have any nefarious catfishing purposes. He had just hoped that someone would fall for his personality and afterwards “share a laugh” that he’d used a famous person’s picture. Once Debbie actually wants to meet in person, however, Rizzo and Pepe warn him that this is the recipe for a disaster. Pepe’s advice is to “Leave a note saying you love her but you’re ashamed. Then, drink poison,” with which Rizzo wholeheartedly concurs.
Later that day, all three cook up a scheme where they trick Liam Hemsworth into thinking they want to have him on Up Late and then once they get him in the room, Gonzo pleads his case with the–in Pepe’s words–“gorgeous” man, asking him to meet Debbie for him and to then tell her the truth and introduce her to the…whatever she had actually been talking to this whole time, Gonzo. You particularly have to hand it to Hemsworth (as in the actor, not the version of himself he plays here) for not taking himself too seriously, particularly when Rizzo basically indicates that the roles he’s had up to this point don’t warrant a guest spot on Miss Piggy’s show. Zing! At the same time, he satirizes his own pretty-boy persona by proceeding to do exactly what Gonzo did. After talking to Debbie for a while and then revealing that he isn’t Gonzo but is instead a (sort-of) famous actor, he instantly changes tactics when she tells him that she cares more about his personality than his looks–or so she says–and asks her if she wants to go out to a real dinner, and off they go! “This online dating stuff really works!” Rizzo cracks.
Nick Offerman hits on a willing Janice in what seems to be an unfortunately deleted scene.
And while, as with the Piggy storyline, Gonzo doesn’t go nearly as zany as he might have in the past, a number of things really worked for me here. Gonzo’s pretending to be someone other than himself makes for a nice reference to his gentler, sadder, more sentimental side, as exemplified in his classic song, “I’m Going to Go Back There Someday,” while his choice of fake identity speaks to his sillier side, nicely blending both aspects of his personality. At the same time, the plot provides a nice opportunity for banter between Gonzo and Pepe, and more importantly, Rizzo, his old comedy team partner. The discovery of how well these two characters (who hadn’t been paired together before Jim’s death) bounced off each other made up one of the best aspects of the “trilogy” of 90s Muppet movies–The Muppet Christmas Carol, Muppet Treasure Island, and Muppets from Space–and their back-and-forth chemistry shines through here just as well.
And speaking of Muppet friendships, the episode’s main story revolves around one of the most important in the canon, namely Kermit and Fozzie, who hadn’t gotten much one-on-one buddy time up till now. The punnish title “Bear Left Then Bear Write” is hilarious in its literalness, for that’s exactly what Fozzie does–leaves the show to pursue a career as a screenwriter after Kermit, in order to avoid hurting his best friend’s feelings, lies to him about having loved a sketch he wrote (he panics after shortly considering a move back to Mississippi to avoid Fozzie, a great bit of continuity as that is, indeed, where Kermit originally hailed from, as did Jim Henson!). After Kermit realizes the mistake he made in encouraging him, he tries to take back what he said, which just upsets Fozzie. “You don’t have to believe in me,” he says. “I believe in me…See, that’s good dialogue right there.” “Honestly,” Kermit replies, “it’s a little contrived.” And while Fozzie’s wrongheaded, I love that some of his self-esteem issues that featured in the first two episodes give way to his over-confidence in himself and his abilities here.
With Fozzie gone, Kermit finds someone he thinks will be a suitable replacement, Nick Offerman! But Nick ends up being more trouble than he’s worth when he starts making Piggy-like demands, first wanting a cappuccino machine and then changing his mind and requesting a boat. Offerman’s flawless deadpan makes his cameo a particular joy to behold, particularly when he considers naming the boat “Janice” and gives her a seductive wink.
That’s when Kermit retreats to his office and begins to consider his relationship with Fozzie, remembering how the bear had always stood by him. One time, when Kermit was dejected about show business, he’d apparently considered going to medical school, “but turns out they just wanted to dissect me”. And Fozzie was there to help him pick up the pieces. Kermit looks at a series of slides of his best friend helping to cheer him up and realizes he wasn’t nearly as good a friend to Fozzie as he’s always been to him, so he goes off to get him back.
Kermit helps his woozy friend, Fozzie.
This is another scene that belies some critics’ assertion that The Muppets have abandoned the heart of Jim’s creation. The show may display a touch more Hollywood cynicism than in the old days but that’s balanced by moments such as this, where Kermit decides to drop everything and simply apologize to his friend. As with all of the Muppets’ best work, it’s sentimental, it’s sweet, and it’s ultimately very funny when Kermit tracks Fozzie to the woods and finds him just in time for the bear to be shot by a park ranger’s tranquilizer dart after he’s caught trying to grab a camping family’s food (he hadn’t realized it was theft; he had just seen some food, which was kept dangling from a tree, specifically to be out of the reach of bears).
Later, Kermit apologizes to a very woozy Fozzie and tells him that, although his sketch may not be ready to go on air now, he’ll help him work on it until it is. Which is so heartwarming and also then humorously undercut by Fozzie asking him if he’s ever been tranquilized, and Kermit responding, “No, but I did lick my third cousin once and the walls started melting, so I feel you, bro.” Is this a joke the old show would have done? Probably not, but, again, it’s a perfect melding of the show’s edgier humor with the same go-over-the-children’s-heads mentality the Muppets have always had, while also, again, undercutting sentimentality before things can get too gooey, another Muppet trademark.
A few more things:
- This is the second episode in a row where Kermit’s new fling, Denise, doesn’t appear and I’m very impressed with the show for being so restrained with her appearances. It keeps the focus of the series from being all about the (current) end of Kermit and Piggy’s romantic relationship, allowing plots to flourish from other work-related stresses, at least for the time being, as well as distracting fans from just directing ire at Denise week after week.
- Along with Rowlf, another classic Muppet dog makes a blink-and-you-miss-it cameo this week: Miss Piggy’s tiny, white dog, Foo-Foo, who unlike Rowlf, acts almost entirely as a real dog would–a particularly spoiled lap dog, that is.
- Which also calls to mind Bobo’s realization that, oh, yeah, Fozzie and he are both bears, an adorably meta wink at the fact that Bobo looks much more like an actual bear, whereas Fozzie has a more of a teddy bear exterior.
- My favorite line of the episode goes to Kermit this week, trying to deflect blame after Fozzie specifically mentions his name as being the reason he decided to quit: “Kermit is like the third most popular frog name in America!”
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